Domestic Violence and abuse in the Muslim community - Resource collection
by Sheila Musaji
Imam Suhaid Webb recently put an article online that needs to be widely read in the Muslim community. The article includes a graphic video documenting domestic abuse in the United States.
Future Imams: We are Engaged in 1,000 year old Theological Wars and Our Communities Bleed. Let’s Get with Reality and Deal with the Real!
A few years back, while in the states, I received a chilling phone call from a scared sister; voice shaking and tears falling she said, “Suhaib, my husband………………..my husband beat me! He beat me in front of our apartment in front of the non-Muslims?” I latter found out that she went to the hospital with a fractured skull.
Brothers, I’m new to this internet game but what I’ve seen disgusts me. We are arguing, and I’m guilty of this as well, over issues that have no impact on our communities except leading by real bad examples. I encourage myself and all of our future Imams, leaders and Shyukh to get with the real. Take a look at this video and realize that these things are happening in your communities and arguing the finner points of aqida, destroying each other and establishing your kingdom are not going to do much to help. Our communities are dying and we are fighting over very trivial issues. I ask for your forgiveness if I’ve done anything to any of you. Let’ s move forward and benefit our societies.
This fatwa of Sheikh Fadlallah, who is well known for his position against honor crimes that are widespread in “democratic” Jordan and Syria, begins by acknowledging that though women have regained many of their rights they still suffer from discrimination and violence. He then proceeds to describe the different types of violence that women suffer from: domestic violence (forced to marry, beaten up, raped, sworn at, deprived of marital rights, thrown out of the house, not allowed to continue with her education), social violence (honor crimes, low pay at work)… and so on.
After this overview he moves on to issue his fatwa in which he states that since Islam looks at women as equal to men, and a marriage in Islam is based on “Ma’rouf” (tenderness, respect and love in treating each other) hence, no man has the right to control an adult woman (wilaiyah) and no husband is allowed to swear at, beat up or force his wife to do what she doesn’t want to do. Accordingly, if a husband beats up his wife she is allowed to beat him back in self defence and if he deprives her of her marital rights she has the right to deprive him of whatever they agreed on in the marriage contract.
An interesting point mentioned in the fatwa is that in no place in Islamic texts was it mentioned that women have to do housework so a man should be grateful that his wife is volunteering to take care of the household.
... Anyway, what we really need for the time being is more sheikhs like Fadlallah and hopefully, some time in the future, the day will come when Muslims world wide would use their brains and commensense inleading their lives instead of waiting for muftis to tell them what to do.
This is a real problem that requires real solutions in real time. Today would be best. Insh’Allah we will continue to collect resources that may help individuals and local communities to deal with this problem.
A perspective on domestic violence in the Muslim community, Salma Abugideiri
Allah does not allow domestic violence, Imam Abdullah El-Amin
Arab and Muslim women: Walk in Faith, Not Fear, Meha Ahmed
Authority and the Abuse of Power in Muslim Marriages, Shaykh Seraj Hendricks
Community Pressure as a Deterrent to Injustice, Uzma Mazhar
Does the Qur’an tolerate domestic abuse: interview with Laleh Bakhtiar on Qur’an 4:34
Domestic Abuse by Muslim Men? Is the 18% Statistic Too Low?, Dr. Robert D. Crane
Domestic Violence Prevention & Education in Faith-Based Communities - a collection of resources
Domestic Violence in Muslim Families, Dr. Jeremiah McAuliffe
Domestic violence hurts Muslims too: Stop the hurt now, by Aneesah Nadir, MSW, CISW
Domestic Violence: The Numbers, Mother Jones.
Don’t Hold All Muslims Responsible for Men Who Misuse Quran, Beat Women, by Summer Hathout
Ending Domestic Violence in Muslim Families, Sharifa Al-Khateeb
Forced Marriages, Uzma Mazhar
interfaith resource guide on “Family violence and religion”
Imam Mohammed Fadel on honor killings
Imam says Islam, family violence don’t mix; goes on hunger strike
Imam’s Guide to deal with domestic violence, By Abdul Malik Mujahid
Imams Guide for Dealing with Abusive Men, Uzma Mazhar
Interfaith Group Takes New Approach to Domestic Abuse, Rebecca Rosen Lum
Islam and Honor Killings. By Imam Zaid Shakir
Islamic Perspective on “Honor Killings”, Muslim Womens League
Islamic perspective on violence against women, Muslim Womens League
Murder of Aasiya Hassan:
American Muslims Call For Swift Action Against Domestic Violence, Dr. Hesham Hassaballa http://www.godfaithpen.com/2009/02/american-muslims-call-for-swift-action.html
Domestic Violence, Mohammad Khaku http://www.theamericanmuslim.org/tam.php/features/articles/domestic_violence1/0017185
Domestic Violence, Dr. Aslam Abdullah http://www.theamericanmuslim.org/tam.php/features/articles/domestic_violence/0017184
Khutbah by Sh. Hamza Yusuf http://blog.beliefnet.com/cityofbrass/2009/02/khutba-on-domestic-violence-by.html
PFP Condemns Beheading of Aasiya Hassan, Wife of Bridges TV Founder http://www.peacefulfamilies.org/pressrelease090214.html
Muslim Women, Domestic Violence and the Role of Education and Awareness Programs, Altaf Husain, MSW, LSW
Muslims working against domestic violence, Imam Johari Abdul Malik
QUR’AN 4:34 misinterpreted. 4:34 (beating wives) - Beating women or beating around the bush, or ... Edip Yuksel , - Commentary  - The Dynamics of Male-Female Relationships: A Contemporary Analysis of Qur’an - Sura Al-Nisaa (Ayah 34) 4:34, Amina Wadud-Muhsin  - Commentary on The Qur’an 4:34, Dr. Ahmad Shafaat  - Does Qur’anic verse 4:34 “allow a superior husband to beat his inferior, disobedient wife?”, Linda Bogaert 
Religion and family violence research team
Wife Abuse in the Muslim Community, Kamran Memon
Why Muslim families should be free of domestic violence (pdf brochure)
Wife beating in Islam, Jamal Badawi
Baitul Salaam shelter network
Muslim Women’s Resource Center
Apna Ghar a domestic violence shelter
An Imam’s Guide to dealing with domestic violence
Stand! Against Domestic Violence
Shalom Bayit: Bay Area Jewish Women Working to End Domestic Violence
Faith Trust Institute
Peace and Safety in the Christian Home
Muslim Womens League
Peaceful Families Project.
Muslims against domestic violence
Turning Point - NYC
There are a number of organizations working to stop this epidemic, and there is a list of Jewish, Christian, Muslim, and other resources available on the Religion Newswriters site.